


Be With Me

by SpaceWall



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Gen, I can’t believe that’s a real tag, Male-Female Friendship, Post-Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker, Self-Esteem Issues, The First Order Sucks, The First Order isn’t great about teaching kids self love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-24
Updated: 2020-01-24
Packaged: 2021-02-27 16:01:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,053
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22389856
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SpaceWall/pseuds/SpaceWall
Summary: Rose has spent a long time trying to convince Finn to stop thinking his life is worth less than everyone else’s. Obviously, after his stunt at the end of TROS, they have to have a conversation about it.Ft. Jannah, who sleeps through this fic because fighting the Sith is Exhausting
Relationships: Finn & Rose Tico
Comments: 2
Kudos: 13





	Be With Me

**Author's Note:**

> CW: some vague mentions of canonical child abuse

They don’t talk about it until later, when the party is over and everyone had gone off to celebrate or mourn as suits them. Rey, Finn knows, is meditating somewhere nearby. She’ll be back soon. Poe is with his pilot friends, those that are left. They have a great deal of mourning to do. Chewie, Artoo, Threepio and Lando are off doing the same. Their losses are different, old and fresh wounds layered over each other. So, it’s only Finn, Rose and Jannah who are there, bottles at hand as they go from tipsy to drunk.

Well, really only Finn and Rose. Jannah is asleep, stretched their laps. She’s easier with touch than almost anyone Finn has ever known, and he is going to protect her with his life. Judging from the tender way Rose touches the sleeping girl, pulling hair away from her half-open mouth, she feels the same. Did they only meet hours ago? It feels like it could have been a lifetime. 

“How long is it going to take us to convince you that your life has value?” Rose’s voice is soft, but in the bay of the cargo hold that they’ve occupied, tucked between two stacks of boxes, it bounces from wall to wall as if a whole chorus was questioning him. 

“That wasn’t why I did it.” He thought of her words on Crait as he was crashing the ship he stood on, knowing he was going to die. They’ll always live with him, no matter where he goes. “This was different.”

Rose has always been generous with her ability to listen. “Why was it different?”

It’s not entirely something he can explain. It’s the same thing that brought him to the right ship in the first place, the same thing he was trying to tell Rey about in the sands. “It’s different because I knew it was what I had to do, and because I knew that we were going to die if I didn’t do it as easily as if I did.”

There’s more to it than that, but Rose doesn’t interrupt as he gathers his thoughts. Her free hand, the one that isn’t tangled up in Jannah’s, reaches up to touch her pendant. 

“When I charged the cannon, I really thought I was going to die. I thought that, after messing everything up and getting everyone killed, it was the least I could do.”

Rose sighs, softly. “That was all our faults, Finn. And mostly Poe’s, if we’re being completely honest. Holdo’s too, and the General’s for not making the chain of command clear at the beginning.”

He knows that, but it doesn’t make it weigh any less heavily. “The point is, that was different. Here, I just saw the opportunity and I knew that there was something I could do to help my friends. Because I love you and I didn’t want you to be in danger.”

The hand that’s on her pendant drifts down to tangle with Finn’s. They aren’t lovers, exactly, but they need each other. And they do love each other, just as much as he loves Rey and Poe, as he thinks he’ll come to love Jannah, in time. Although he does wish that she wasn’t putting his legs to sleep. 

“I love you, too. And I’m glad that you feel less replaceable, now.”

Her words are blunt as a hammer, but she’s right. The sad reality of the situation is that Finn has spent most of his life being replaceable. Stormtroopers are supposed to do whatever is best for the collective, without hesitation, without the slightest sentiment that their lives are of value. Finn will probably spend the rest of his life parsing through the ways this affects his every decision, his every thought.

“I’m not replaceable,” he forces the words out of his mouth. They burn his throat and it feels good. “I’m not, because Poe and Rey and you love me.”

She squeezes his hand. “You’re not replaceable because you’re a person. We love you too, but that doesn’t matter. You’d deserve to live just as much as the rest of us even if you were a complete sleemo. The fact that you worry about it proves the point. I bet you not a single First Order officer ever wondered if he deserved to live.”

She’s right, and Finn knows that, but he doesn’t really want to talk about it today. He’s already faced his mortality more times than most people will in their whole lives in the span of a few hours. 

“Hey,” he says, “do you have a plan for what you’re going to do next?”

Rose has been in the Resistance a long time, and has cared about its values even longer. It shouldn’t be a surprise that she says, “I’m going back to Canto Bight, and I’m going to put a stop to all of it.”

They’re both pleasantly tipsy, and Finn really meant the question to be an ambitious one anyways. “Good. I’m going to find the rest of the first order bases, and the ‘schools’ where they train us when we’re kids, and I’m gonna take all the kids out of there.”

That makes Rose smile. “You’d be such a dad. General Finn and his Hundred Children. Sounds like a kid’s story.”

Honestly, it’s not the worst idea Finn’s ever heard. They’ll go to a world where everything is green, and there’s always enough water, and Rey can stay too. Some of the kids might even be force sensitive. Surely, a real government will only need so many generals. Rose can come visit once she’s done liberating Canto Bight. When Poe is done being the General, he can come too. Surely Jannah will be happy to help. 

Her smile fading slightly, Rose says, “in all seriousness, though. I think that’s a great idea, Finn. If you want me to help, I’ll be with you.”

She’s the one who’s given him this dream. Without her, Finn wouldn’t believe in anything other than Rey. “I’ll be on Canto Bight. Just say the word.”

His instincts tell him that it would be a good place to be, that there’s something to be gained from going back there. Finn is quickly learning that trusting his instincts is a good idea.

“I’d like that,” says Rose.

**Author's Note:**

> Hmm buddy force wants you to go back to Canto Bight wonder what you’re gonna find there. 
> 
> Rey comes too, they end capitalism, Anakin gives them high fives from the after life, it’s pretty great. 
> 
> Reading greatly appreciated many thank much love.


End file.
